What Exactly IS Generosity?

As I began my Lenten practice of generosity, I first realized that I need to define precisely what generosity actually is. My initial thought was that generosity was all about charitable financial giving. But as I started to think about it more, I saw that this is a very narrow definition and a limiting way to think.

According to Merriam-Webster (because the dictionary is always a good place to start!), “generous” is liberal in giving, marked by abundance or ample proportions, or characterized by a noble or kindly spirit. Some synonyms are perhaps even more thought-provoking: charitable, unselfish, open, openhanded, lavish, compassionate, Samaritan, and big-hearted. This provides a lot of inspiration!

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My association of generosity with charitable giving matches the classic Lenten focus on almsgiving. There are always opportunities to do charitable giving, and in a way, I suspect this may be one of the easiest ways to be generous. Not that we all have stacks of cash to donate to worthy causes, but writing a check doesn’t often lead to that “metanoia” (conversion of spirit) that I’m seeking this Lent. It’s an excellent thing to do, but it can be impersonal and removed. I consider charitable contributions important, but my focus during Lent is finding other ways to be generous.

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The list of synonyms for “generous” helps me think of other ways to practice generosity:

• “Unselfish” means not always putting myself and my needs first. For example, I may have planned to spend the next hour relaxing on my own (reading, watching a movie), but if a friend reaches out and needs to talk, it’s generous to put her needs first and be willing to adjust my plans.
• “Open” reminds me that one way of being generous with those I love is by openly sharing who I am, even when it makes me feel vulnerable. When I show them a side of myself I’m not particularly pleased with, I am being generous in the relationship. I trust them enough to reveal a part of me that I’d rather hide. I am showing that I’m not perfect and that I don’t expect them to be perfect.
• “Openhanded” evokes an image of holding something lightly in an outstretched palm rather than tightly grasping. This encourages me not to treat generosity as a project where I must check off boxes and achieve something specific. I tend to make even spiritual things into a project to manage, so remembering this image is particularly important for me. I can trust that God will provide opportunities to stretch my generosity and teach me more about myself and the things holding me back from being a better person.
• “Lavish” helps me think about abundance. I am often afraid that there isn’t “enough” of something – this could be my time, money, or even some of my possessions. But I believe God provides me with what I truly need (although not always what I want!). So, it will be good for me to push the boundaries of having “enough” and trust in God’s abundance in providing what I need when I actually need it. I don’t always have to accumulate more.
• “Compassionate” cautions me that I don’t always know what is best for someone. To be generous, I need to pay attention to what the other person needs or wants rather than what I think would be best for them. It means being OK with not being recognized or thanked for every generous action. And it means being compassionate with myself when, in hindsight, I realize I missed an opportunity, or I did something that I thought was generous but made someone feel uncomfortable.
• The word “Samaritan” particularly caught my attention. It’s remarkable that the biblical parable about the good Samaritan has penetrated so firmly into popular culture and language. This word reminds me to be generous to strangers, the people I might never see again or who might not ever thank me. To be generous just because I see someone in need and I have the resources to help.
• And finally, “big-hearted” reminds me that generosity is, above all, a state of the heart. I shouldn’t be so wrapped up in my head that I miss seeing opportunities to be generous when they occur. And I can’t go wrong by listening to my heart, and reminding myself when in doubt, choose the action that leads to a bigger heart.

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A Closing Prayer

As someone who loves words and their nuances, I appreciate all the different insights on generosity that spring from a list of synonyms! Thank you, God, for already expanding my perspective on generosity and inspiring me to continue exploring this during the remaining weeks of Lent.

Amen.